Giving up gaming

A momentus event for most male gamers, far more so than with female gamers, and usually to be blamed on either one or a combination of three things:

• Getting a life -This is where the male gamer doesn't really want to quit, but is forced to quit due to real life issues interfering with the time he'd usually be spending either eating, sleeping or gaming. Due to small penis syndrome the former gamer sometimes would still frequent IRC or the forums, and act all superior generally managing to piss people off.

• Getting a girlfriend -This is where the male gamer also does not really want to quit, but is lured away by the promise of boobs access. Once nibbling at the bait the male gamer will find that suddenly much more time will be spent AFK than originally taken into consideration, often due to having to do things he's never done before to maintain unlimited access to the boobs, like going outside in the daylight. Sometimes a male gamer will hook up with a female gamer (rare) and have the best of both worlds (he thinks) but more often than not the period where he would spend 22 hours in a caffiene fueled pwning spree and sleep 15 minutes a day would end regardless.

• Getting married -This is where the girl persuades the male gamer to follow through and become her obedient servant. As the male (former) gamer's day is now so filled with tasks like paint the garage door dear, clean out the workroom dear or take me to the shops so you can carry things for me dear, he hardly has time to even go near the pc any more. If he does manage it, he usually finds that a number of events have occured:
  • the box is no longer leet, meaning that his once mighty computer is now so out of date and riddled with spyware the Mrs installed because she demanded an account with admin rights so she could install cool things like PrettyPictures.exe that she got in the mail from some american, that it is near impossible to play anything at all.
  • the skillz are shot to hell, meaning that the finely honed twitch-hand-eye coordination is gone. Gone! And the bloody mousemat looks like someone's eaten their lunch off it too! Where it goes, nobody knows.
  • teh mates don't understand him, meaning that he says things in IRC like yeah Sean, I was talking to Danielle about getting the mortgage extended so we can have the study rebuilt through the sere and Sean responds d00d! WTF? uc headshot WTF wallHA><!! gonna d/c pwn CSS teh su><or!!